Connie, Rudy & Rita

Connie, Rudy and Rita

by P.C. Wysiwyg

Connie, the constantly constipated constable stared in consternation at the artfully arranged array of carnations. He was off duty with Rudy, tasting a tutti-fruiti, amid a towering bower of flowers. Rudy had a tutti-frutti and a root beer too. They surveyed the cavernous conservatory in it's three-story glory. They roamed the rooms of transplanted plants giving each one a glance. For hours and hours they were up to their eyeballs in iris's and knee deep in peonies. On staked stalks along the walks, rows of roses under their noses, scorning the thorns. Fancy, flowery fragrances wafted on drafts up to the rafters. They sat to relax between the lupines and lilacs.
At the bench across from the chrysanthemums Rudy had a rendezvous with Rita. He was here to meet her, and she was there to meet him in the arboretum. Rita, that silly, underfed redhead by the lilies. They strolled hand in hand beneath the palms and trellised trees and flowing flowers. Orchids hovered over the lovers under filigreed ferns. They passed pansies and impatiens on the path. Their two lips touched by the tulips. They were lip-locked by the hollyhocks. They dallied by the dallias and daylilies and reached delirium near the antheriums.
In a room of aroma Connie eyed the calla's, cana's and caladiums. He sampled the scented exhibits, savoring the smells. There were towering tiers of trays for days. Baskets abounded full of foliage. Clumsy Connie earned spurns for an over-turned fern; it fell on him while he was smelling a pelargonium. Then he backed into and broke a basket of begonias. He showed his badge to Madge, the manager, who managed to massage the maddened mob with a rambling, ancient anecdote, acquired from her ancestors, pertaining to the drainage of geraniums.
Madge's monologue covered as Connie, Rudy and Rita were spied trying to slide outside. The door was open wide, so they tried. They were denied. Rita cried, Rudy got snooty while Connie, full of contempt, attempted a convincing con, apologizing profusely. The guard goons yawned and responded with baton blows and fist-throws. Rudy ran to Rita's rescue, retrieving her from the raging wrath of those rent-a-cops. He picked up a plaster planter, planted with periwinkle and pummeled a guard. Rita commenced to flinging flats of flowers at the encroaching crowd. Connie responded with Tae Quan Do and a fearsome bellow, cutting an escape swath eight feet wide. All three flee into the street. It'll be a long time before the fleeing threesome comes to see some flower shows.