The Haranguer

This specimen, the trio's first attempt at an art piece, is just as the name implies, only more so; a complaining, accusatory loudmouth verbally assaulting any passerby. This is like the others that follow is a surreal piece; a thing extracted from the unconscious and manifested in the flesh. The head does the ad lib vocalizations, the large hand uses sign language to follow the head's monologue. The smaller hand just below it 'countersigns' using sign language to say the opposite of what the head is saying. The hole at the top of the neck, between the head and the hands is the rectum. As feces is extruded the tiny arms and legs on the neck kick or grab chunks of it, throwing it in all directions. The specimen's left arm is a hideous creature which softly coos kind remarks and sweet-nothings in a constant counter to the head's screaming. The right is not holding a hammer, it is permanently attached. That arm, like every other appendage on this specimen, has a mind of it's own and it likes to swing that hammer at anything that comes close enough to hit and it won't stop until there's nothing left.
In order to control this creature, and not to fall victim to it's hammer, the doctors chose sedatives to shut it up, to transport it or put it to sleep, and used stimulants to wake it up.
As it turned out the creature was very good at haranguing. It had an extensive vocabulary and was quite good at ad libbing clever, albeit vicious insults nonstop. It accidentally killed itself when the hammer-hand beat the rest of the body to a pulp.

Happy Jack

"Happy Jack", Lügner tells us, was an art "piece" designed as a hideously grotesque, yet gregarious, polite and outgoing thing. A gentle, friendly and witty character who was at the same time, by any measure, undeniably repulsive. It was not in Happy Jack's nature to be embarrassed by his looks (or foul body aroma) nor to be discouraged by the reactions of those he encountered. The doctors had eliminated Jack's ego, so Jack couldn't feel bad about himself. The name "Happy Jack" suited him. He was intelligent, articulate, witty and quite a good dancer. He told good jokes, liked to sing, practically the life of the party, but without being a bore.

Jack was a three and a half foot tall cyclops with an elephant-like trunk, long razor-sharp teeth, and feet like four-fingered hands. His skin was covered with warts, the lower half of his body having many orifices from which feeler-like tentacles darted in and out, others emitting malodorous gasses. He was quite dexterous with his trunk and feet. He was a vegetarian, eating only raw fruits and vegetables.

The doctors were approached by a Hollywood director who wanted to use Jack in a cheap horror movie but they turned him down. Happy Jack died of old age when he was two years old.

The Muse

This 'piece' was created for a surrealist exhibit in Paris. It is a little over twelve feet high, able to move about, rather slowly, under it's own power and truly surreal. It's ears are mounted atop a donut-like cranium. It's two different-colored eyes follow anyone coming close. The six foot wide mouth reciting surrealistic poetry for hours on end. It's left and right (?) arms slapping out percussive rhythms on it's ample, fleshy sides. Six relatively tiny teats on it's underbelly suggest a feminine gender. It has four 'legs'. The skin of one leg morphs into the cloth of a patched pant leg, it's foot being that of a skeleton. It's mate-leg has a rather high knee, the shin below being clothed in a vest and a prop six-gun belt. Two tiny arms slap it's sides challenging anyone passing by. The foot of this leg is a large left hand. The next leg, moving in a clockwise direction, is more like a very large forearm with an even larger right hand for a foot. Near the top of this leg is a small curtained window. The fourth leg is a stump at the knee with a prosthesis that is a coil spring wearing a right-foot wingtip shoe.
Unfortunately, this piece was lost at sea when the ship on which it was being transported sank.

The Camper

This specimen was designed as a compact mobile camper, and like the rest of these 'inventions', one with surrealistic dimensions. The 'camper' consists of a small head to maintain autonomic navigation, mobility and the camper's internal functions. Huge arms with large strong hands provide lifting and carrying, among other functions. The right leg mysteriously has a hole in it where the knee should be and instead of a foot at the end of the leg, there are four tiny legs. Although they are arranged as if on a horse, their little legs bend at the knee like human legs. The left 'leg', though it is bendable, has no knee. It appears to be attached to the body 'sideways' and from where the knee would be on down it has a humanoid form - two little arms and two little legs. This 'leg' has to sidestep when the camper walks. This model has a windowbox installed, growing vegetables and flowers.